Ben Cousins, disgraced footballer, has a new job of promoting Australia’s Literary Classic, Tom Collins’s, Such is Life

Champion footballer Ben Cousins has begun promoting literary Australia. He’s tattooed in no uncertain way – across his belly – with the title of the Australian Classic, Such is Life by Tom Collins. There’s hope for Aussie rules yet. There’s not much hope for Ben Cousins though. Apart from being on the brink of a drug life and a future of “Duh” for his brain life, he is suspected of giving his mate Mainwaring the drugs that he consumed on the night he died.

But as he waves his footy career goodbye he can stroll Western Australia’s beaches picking up those literary chicks. Although most won’t notice him, their heads buried in that other literary cult classic, Freud and the Nazis Go Surfing.


5 Responses

  1. This is an interesting take. I am from the ABC and would like to contact you. How can I do this?

  2. This is an interesting take. I am from the ABC and would like to speak to you about this. How can I do that?

  3. He, he. Interesting writings here. Am just preparing a piece on Ben as Worst Spiritual Leader for The Worst of Perth.

    Liked the embassy eviction story too. Will come back to view some archives.

  4. Although “Such is life” is better known as Ned Kelly’s last words.

  5. Yes, I know, but didn’t want to indulge him.

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